What a foolish Quest
Name: What a foolish Quest.
Location: Thais
Requirements: 40 level, Shovel or a substitute, Rope or a substitute, Spoon, 2 Kitchen Knife, 18 Vial of Wine, 24 Flour, Red Piece of Cloth, Blue Piece of Cloth, Yellow Piece of Cloth, Green Piece of Cloth, 5 White Piece of Cloth, Spider Silk, 4 Minotaur Leather, Some gold for travel, of which there will be a lot, Made Eleonore's Missing Ring Quest and Blue Djinn Quest or Green Djinn Quest.
Reward: Ability to join the Jester Guild and perform Jester Outfits Quest, Jester Staff, Jester Hat.
Monsters: Rotworm, Dwarf Guard, Slime, Stalker, Orcs, Minotaurs, Apes, Quara Constrictor or Quara Constrictor Scout.
Start
To complete the mission you must go to Thais Castle, northwest of Depot. There you will find the NPC clown Bozo.
Mission 1 - First Mission
Talk to Bozo:
- Player: Hi
- Bozo: Hi there, how's it hanging, Player!
- Player: Join
- Bozo: Do you wish to become a jester and join the fools guild?
- Player: Yes
- Bozo: So you want to make a total fool of yourself? Fine with me, but note that becoming a real fool means more than being just an ordinary fool ...
- Bozo: You will have to master a whole series of challenging, lengthy and, above all, totally foolish quests ...
- Bozo: Are you sure you want to waste a part of your limited lifetime on a quest that makes a fool of yourself and which might award you with the prestigious title of a grand foolin a far away future?
- Player: Yes
- Bozo: What a foolish decision! You are indeed a worthy candidate! But let's talk about business ...
- Bozo: Being a jester is not just about telling jokes. A good jester heavily relies on requisites ...
- Bozo: Getting some requisites will be your first job. First of all we need a good supply of water squirt flowers ...
- Bozo: I'm making them on my own in my spare time but I need the right material. South of Thais, next to the Whiteflower Temple, you will find the ideal flowers ...
- Bozo: Take a kitchen knife, cut the thickest and healthiest flower and bring it here. Then talk to me about your mission.
- Player:Bye
- Bozo: Remember: A joke a day keeps the ghouls away!
Your first task will be to get a White Flower to make a gushing water surprise bouquet.
Failure to cut the flower.
When we succeed, we lose the knife and the flower appears on the ground.
To get this plant, you need to go to White Flower Temple. Once there, use Kitchen Knife on the White Flower.
Now go back to Bozo and say:
- Player: Hi
- Bozo: Hi there, how's it hanging, Player!
- Player: Mission
- Bozo: Do you have a fitting flower for me?
- Player: Yes
- Bozo: Indeed. This flower will do the trick, so to say. Just ask me about another mission whenever you're ready.
Mission 2 - That stinks!
First, ask for the mission:
- Player: Hi
- Bozo: Hi there, how's it hanging, Player!
- Player: Mission
- Bozo: The next task will be a bit more difficult. I pride myself on being the major manufacturer of stink bombs in whole Tibia. Stop chuckling you fool aspirant ...
- Bozo: The worst part is getting the perfect stench. Whenever a slime dies, it leaves a noxious gas cloud ...
- Bozo: If you are able to collect its scent in the first few seconds after the slime's death, we have the ideal substance to create dozens of stink bombs ...
- Bozo: Take this special vial and fill it with the perfect stench. Then return here and we will talk about your mission.
- Player:Bye
- Bozo: Remember: A joke a day keeps the ghouls away!
Now Bozo wants us to provide him with a special vial of slime gas to make stink bombs. After killing one, quickly use a special vial on it.
After collecting the Slime, the vial of slime will appear on the ground.
Once you've got the gas, go back to Bozo and say:
- Player: Hi
- Bozo: Hi there, how's it hanging, Player!
- Player: Mission
- Bozo: Do you have acquired the exquisite stench we need?
- Player: Yes
- Bozo: Ugh. You got some efficient stuff there. I have to admit you have a talent for such distasteful matters. Perhaps you feel ready for another mission. Just ask me about it.
Mission 3 - A Piece of Cake
- Player: Hi
- Bozo: Hi there, how's it hanging, Player!
- Player: Mission
- Bozo: I think you're ready for a small promotion. Provided that you finish another mission, that is ...
- Bozo: As you might know, nothing helps you to break the ice so easily when you meet new people as a pie thrown in the face ...
- Bozo: Of course, this habit leads to a dramatic shortage of pies now and then. And that's what we need you for. Mirabell in Edron creates the most creamy and sticky pies in theworld ...
- Bozo: Get me a dozen of them, this means 12, you fool. Then report to me about your mission.
- Player: Bye
- Bozo: Remember: A joke a day keeps the ghouls away!
We will need 24 pieces of flour for this mission. We can get it by cutting grain with a scythe or buy ready-made grain on a farm in Thais from a farmer Donald McRonald for 1 gp.
Once we have grain, we have to go to the mill to convert it into flour. Once we have everything, sail to Edron and head to Mirabell and talk to her as follows.
Conversation with Mirabell.
- Player: Hi
- Mirabell: Welcome to the Horn of Plenty, Player.
- Player: pies
- Mirabell: Due to the high demand, I sell them only in boxes of 12 pies. So if you want to buy my delicious cake, you'll have to order 12 pies.
- Player: 12 pies
- Mirabell: Oh you've heard about my excellent pies, didn't you? I am flattered. Unfortunately I'm completely out of flour. I need 2 portions of flour for one pie. Just tell me when you have enough flour for your pies.
- Player: Flour
- Mirabell: Do you bring me the flour needed for your pies?
- Player: Yes
- Mirabell: Excellent. Now I can start baking the pies. As you helped me, I will make you a good price for them.
We learn that Mirabell sells cakes, only in packs(Box) of 12, just as much as we need. We need to bring 2 pieces of flour for one cake. If we have everything, we talk to her:
- Player: Hi
- Mirabell: Welcome to the Horn of Plenty, Player.
- Player: Boxes of 12 pies
- Mirabell: For 12 pies this is 240 gold. Do you want to buy them?
- Player: Yes
- Mirabell: Here they are. Wait! Two things you should know: Firstly, they won't last long in the sun so you better get them to their destination as quickly as possible ...
- Mirabell: Secondly, since my pies are that delicious it is forbidden to leave the town with them. We can't afford to attract more tourists to Edron.
- Player: Bye
- Mirabell: Come back soon, traveller.
You get a box of cookies. Remember, any attempt to go past the Edron Guardian, travel by carpet or send them by mail will result in the cakes being destroyed and unfit for consumption. You have to go on foot through the rotworm caves to Cormaya then from Cormaya by steamer to Kazordoon and from Kazordoon to Thais.
We end the mission by saying to the jester:
- Player: Hi
- Bozo: Hi there, how's it hanging, Player!
- Player: Mission
- Bozo: So do you bring me a box full of pies?
- Player: Yes
- Bozo: Excellent. Poor Harsky, poor Stutch. They will mourn the day they dared to yawn during a performance of the magnificent Bozo ...
- Bozo: However, I grant you the title of 'Fool in Training' for your efforts. Just don't let it go to your head and don't use this highly spiritual title to show off ...
- Bozo: If you are interested in another mission, talk to me.
Mission 4 - Fool Spirits
We stock up on vials and go to Frodo's inn in Thais. We fill 18 vials of wine that is in the barrels. Now we return to Bozo and hand them to him with the words:
- Player: Hi
- Player: Mission
We go to Xodet in Thais (he is in the Magic Shop). There is a crate in front of the store. Replace it with the one you got from Bozo, then return to him.
Give him back the crate with the words:
- Player: hi
- Bozo: Hi there, how's it hanging, Player!
- Player: mission
- Bozo: Do you bring me Xodet's exchanged crate?
- Player: yes
- Bozo: I see. I guess we can expect a few drunken mages soon! Am I mistaken or are you up for some more challenging missions? Just askme about if you feel foolish enough.
Mission 5 - Watch out for the fool
Discussion:
- Player: hi
- Bozo: Hi there, how's it hanging, Player!
- Player: mission
- Bozo: I have a fine prank in mind but without proper preparation, you'd end up hacked in pieces by the dwarfs. By chance I found out about an artefact that might save the day ...
- Bozo: There is a mysterious tower, known as Triangle Tower, north of Jakundaf Desert. In this tower, you will find a magic watch that we need for our dangerous fun ...
- Bozo: Well, I'll have the fun and you'll have the danger but you can view it from a positive side - view it from my side for instance. Now get that watch and report about your mission.
We go to the Triangle Tower. We go up to the third floor, go through the door with the glowing handle. We take the Magic Watch from the box. We return to Bozo, writing:
- Player: hi
- Bozo: Hi there, how's it hanging, Player!
- Player: mission
- Bozo: Did you get the watch?
- Player: yes
- Bozo: Oh boy, you will have so much fun with that watch if they don't catch and kill you. I envy you so much ...
- Bozo: So listen my little fool, this watch has the power to advance you in time. It will come in handy when you are stealing the beard of the dwarven emperor ...
- Bozo: Oh, come on, don't faint like some baby. It's perfectly safe with that watch ... well, almost. You sneak into the emperor's bedroom when it's empty. Use the watch directly beside the bed's pillow ...
- Bozo: This should advance you in time. You will appear next to the sleeping emperor. His guards will be outside so they shouldn't bother you. Use a sharp kitchen knife to cut off his beard ...
- Bozo: Then quickly use the watch again to advance in time once more. You should appear at a time when everybody has left the room...
- Bozo: Sneak out and come here to report about your mission. As the watch will only work those 2 times, make sure that you've got the beard when returning here.
Together with the watch, we go to Kazordoon. We enter the bedroom of Emperor Kruzak (Note that sometimes this door may be locked. Then you need to get a key 3800, which is located in a box not far from the door).
We stand next to the pillow and use the magical watch. We go back in time. We use a knife (you can take it from the crate next to it) and shave the beard of the sleeping dwarf. (Interesting fact:The dwarf whose beard we cut off is Emperor Kruzak's father.
We kill the Dwarf Guard who appears and take the Dwarven Emperor's Beard from the ground.
We again use the watch by the pillow. It transports us to the real world. We return to Bozo and give him the beard:
- Player: Hi
- Bozo: Hi there, how's it hanging, Player!
- Player: mission
- Bozo: Did you get the beard?
- Player: yes
- Bozo: You got the beard and survived. I think for the first time in my whole life I'm impressed, no wait, it was just a stone in my shoe ...
- Bozo: Still, as a small recognition of your accomplishments I'm willing to tell you how to get your own jester outfit. If you are interested in more fun and adventures, ask me for more missions.
From now on we can get the Jester Outfits Quest.
Mission 6 - The queen of farts
We immediately take 4 Minotaur Leathers and Spider Silk with us so that Bozo can sew a special pillow (Whoopee Cushion).
- Player: Hi
- Bozo: Hi there, how's it hanging, Player!
- Player: mission
- Bozo: You know, nothing has brought more fun and joy to humanity than the whoopee cushion. Its creation is a delicate matter though. Bring me 4 pieces of minotaur leather first and then lets talk about this mission.
- Player: mission
- Bozo: Do you have the four minotaur leathers?
- Player: yes
- Bozo: Good, this was the first part. Now it gets difficult. To sew it together, we need a very fine yarn, as fine as the silk of a giantspider. Bring me some giant spider silk and talk to me about your mission.
- Player: mission
- Bozo: Do you have the spider silk with you?
- Player: yes
- Bozo: Let's see, a stitch here, a stitch there. Hey Presto! A whoopee cushion! Are you ready for the fun part? Then talk to me aboutyour next mission.
- Player: mission
- Bozo: Now that we have this whoopee cushion it would be a waste not to use it, don't you agree ...
- Bozo: Don't speak! I already know what you have in your impish mind my friend and I agree fully. You will bring this cushion to Carlin and place it right on Queen Eloise's throne! Then return here and talk to me about your mission.
The jester will then ask you to carry this pillow to Queen Eloise in Carlin (you must use the pillow on her throne).
Once you've done that, return to Bozo and tell her about your mission.
Mission 7 - For your mice only
- Player: Hi
- Bozo: Hi there, how's it hanging, Player!
- Player: mission
- Bozo: The time has come to play a prank on some arrogant Venorean. I found out that Carina, the jeweller, is terribly afraid of mice ...
- Bozo: Your task is quite easy. Steal the toy mouse of Queen Eloise's cat and show it to Carina in Venore to scare her to death. Then report about your mission.
Your task is to scare Carina, a jeweler in Venore. You have to go to Carlin Castle again. Go underground to the queen's cat room. Use the sleeping basket and take the Toy Mouse. (Note, at the same time Kitty will appear, you can get rid of him by walking away under the door - he will disappear).
Go to Carina and say to her:
- Player: Hi
- Carina: Welcome, Player. I am looking forward to trade with you.
- Player: Mouse
- Carina: Wha ... What??? Are you saying you've seen a mouse here??
- Player: Yes
- Carina: IIIEEEEEK!
Then return to Bozo for the next mission.
Mission 8 - Smoking is a foolish thing
Bozo will ask you to deliver flammable Easy Inflammable Sulphur. Head to the tunnel between Fibula and the continent and use the Spoon on the extinct crater.
Return to the jester and give him the sulfur. Then go to Tiquanda with a kitchen knife and find a bush called Jungle Dweller Bush (west of the depo), cut Some Special Leaves off the plant, then return to Bozo.
From these ingredients, Bozo will make a Cigar, which we'll get when we ask him about the mission again.
Go with him to Liberty Bay, to Theodore Loveless.
- Player: Hi
- Theodore Loveless Greetings, dear visitor Player.
- Player: Cigaro
- Theodore Loveless Oh my. Have you gotten an exquisite cigar for me, my young friend?
- Player: Yes
- Theodore Loveless Ah what a fine blend. I really ...
- Theodore Loveless OUCH! What have you done you fool? How dare you???
Mission 9 - A fool's bargain
We ask about the next mission. We need to fill a vial of blood of a stalker. We return and report to Bozo.
We again ask about the missions and go to Svargrond, Calasse, Frozen Trench. We can also wait for the Quar invasion in Liberty Bay. We have to kill Quara Constrictor and fill the Special Flask with ink from her body. We provide Bozo with the ingredients from which she will make the Magical Inkwell.
We manage to trick Sam in Thais. We talk about the contract:
- Player: hi
- Sam: Welcome to my shop, adventurer Player!
- Player: 2000 steel shields
- Sam: What? You want to buy 2000 steel shields??
- Player: yes
- Sam: I can't believe it. Finally I will be rich! I could move to Edron and enjoy my retirement! But ... wait a minute! I will not start working without a contract! Are you willing to sign one?
- Player: yes
- Sam: Fine! Here is the contract. Please sign it. Talk to me about it again when you're done.
We get a Contract, we sign it "Signed Contract".
- Player: contract
- Sam: Have you signed the contract?
- Player: yes
- Sam: Excellent! I will start working right away! Now that I am going to be rich, I will take the opportunity to tell some people what I REALLY think about them!
Back to Bozo for the next mission.
Mission 10 - A Sweet Surprise
Talk to Bozo:
- Player: mission
- Bozo: This time I have no real mission for you, rather a small errand. I bet you had expected some dangerous and exhausting quest but since I like you so much, I make it veeeeery easy for you ...
- Bozo: Here are some cookies. Beware though, those are exploding confetti cookies. You will have to deliver them to 10 special persons, then return to me and report about your mission. Seems easy, doesn't it? Are you going to accept this mission?
- Player: yes
- Bozo: Great! That's the word of a true fool! Maybe you want to write the names down. Here we go: Deliver a cookie to: ...
- Bozo: The pompous hero Avar Tar in Edron, Simon the greedy beggar on Fibula, the pirate Ariella on the Shattered Isles, the dubious Lorbas next to the ruins of the Dark Cathedral, King Markwin in the underground city Mintwalin ...
- Bozo: The shaman Hjaern on the ice island Nibelor, the witch Wyda in the Green Claw Swamp, the ape Hairycles in the jungle city Banuta ...
- Bozo: The orc king in the orc fortress Uldrek's Rock and the last one to EITHER Yaman, the green djinn, OR, Nah'Bob, the blue djinn ...
- Bozo: A piece of cake isn't it? Did you take notes? If you need the list again, just ask me for it. Otherwise leave now and report about the mission whenever you're done.
- Player: bye
- Bozo: Remember: A joke a day keeps the ghouls away!
We need to distribute 10 cookies. We can distribute them in this order.
1) Avar Tar - Edron
2) Simon the Beggar - Fibula
3) Ariella - Meriana
4) Lorbas - Dark Cathedral
5) Markwin - Mintwallin
6) Hjaern - Nibelor
7) Wyda - Green Claw Swamp
8) Hairycles - Banuta
9) The Orc King - Orc Fortress
10) Yaman, or Nah'Bob
- Player: hi
- Avar Tar: Greetings, traveler Player!
- Player: cookie
- Avar Tar: Do you really think you could bribe a hero like me with a meagre cookie?
- Player: yes
- Avar Tar: Well, you won't! Though it looks tasty ...What the ... WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? THIS IS THE ULTIMATE INSULT! GET LOST!
- Player: hi
- Simon the Beggar: Hello Player. I am a poor man. Please help me.
- Player: cookie
- Simon the Beggar: Have you brought a cookie for the poor?
- Player: yes
- Simon the Beggar: Well, it's the least you can do for those who live in dire poverty. A single cookie is a bit less than I'd expected, but better than ... WHA ... WHAT?? MY BEARD! MY PRECIOUS BEARD! IT WILL TAKE AGES TO CLEAR IT OF THIS CONFETTI!
- Player: hi
- Ariella: Hi there.
- Player: cookie
- Ariella: So you brought a cookie to a pirate?
- Player: yes
- Ariella: How sweet of you ... Uhh ... OH NO ... Bozo did it again. Tell this prankster I'll pay him back.
- Player: hi
- Lorbas: Be greeted, dear traveller.
- Player: cookie
- Lorbas: You want me to eat this cookie?
- Player: yes
- Lorbas: Well, you don't mind if I play around with this antidote rune a bit ... UHHH, YOU LOU ... uhm that was so ... funny, haha ... ha. Mhm,you better leave now.
- Player: hi
- Markwin: Oh, it's you again. What do you want, hornless messenger?
- Player: cookie
- Markwin: You bring me ... a cookie???
- Player: yes
- Markwin: I understand this as a peace-offering, human ... UNGH ... THIS IS AN OUTRAGE! THIS MEANS WAR!!!
- Player: hi
- Hjaern: Be greeted.
- Player: cookie
- Hjaern: You want to sacrifice a cookie to the spirits?
- Player: yes
- Hjaern: In the name of the spirits I accept this offer ... UHNGH ... The spirits are not amused!
- Player: hi
- Wyda: What? A mundane talking to me? Amusing.
- Player: cookie
- Wyda: You brought me a cookie?
- Player: yes
- Wyda: Well, it's a welcome change from all that gingerbread ... AHHH HOW DARE YOU??? FEEL MY WRATH!
- Player: hi
- Hairycles: Be greeted, friend of the ape people. If you want to trade, just ask for my offers. If you are injured, ask for healing.
- Player: cookie
- Hairycles: Oh you bring cookie for old Hairycles?
- Player: yes
- Hairycles: Thank you, you are ... YOU SON OF LIZARD!
- Player: hi
- The Orc King: Harrrrk! You think you are strong now? You shall never escape my wrath! I am immortal!
- Player: cookie
- The Orc King: You bring me a stinking cookie???
- Player: yes
- The Orc King: Well, I hope it stinks a lot. I like stinking cookies best ... BY MY THOUSAND SONS! YOU ARE SO DEAD HUMAN! DEAD!
- Player: hi
- Nah'Bob/Yaman: <Sighs> Another customer! I've only just sat down! What is it, Player?/Well, if it isn't a human. Greetings, Player!
- Player: cookie
- Nah'Bob/Yaman: You brought cookies! How nice of you! Can I have one?
- Player: yes
- Nah'Bob/Yaman: You see, good deeds like this will ... YOU ... YOU SPAWN OF EVIL! I WILL MAKE SURE THE MASTER LEARNS ABOUT THIS!
Return to Bozo:
- Player: hi
- Bozo: Hi there, how's it hanging, Player!
- Player: mission
- Bozo: Are you done with your little delivery mission?
- Player: yes
- Bozo: Indeed, you're done. By the way, you look a little bit tired and dirty. However, if you still have some power left, ask me aboutthe next mission.
Mission 11 - The Final Foolishness
We need to deliver to Bozo 5 White Piece of Cloth from which he will sew us a Bale of White Cloth. We use it on the altar near the wyvern's respawn on Plague Spike.
The white cloth is yellowing. Now we are to bring the Bale of Yellow Cloth to Bozo. It will sew us a Mummy Disguise from it. Note: don't use it yet! We go to Kazzan and use the mummy disguise (you become a mummy for 10 seconds). We talk to Kazzan:
- Player: Hi
- Kazzan: WAAAAAHHH!!!
We check in with Bozo. We get a second addon and a Jester's Cap.